Thursday, July 8, 2010

Will I Feel My Baby Move If I'm Fat?

Whether or not a fat pregnant woman will feel her baby move is one of those myths about fat women and pregnancy that you hear periodically.

I don't hear it very often, but I have heard it a number of times over the years. 

It never ceases to amaze and surprise me that some non-fat folks actually believe this nonsense, but they do.  Some people actually tell fat women that they will never feel their baby move or kick because of their fatness

Puleeeeeeeze.  Like there is fat inside your uterus that will prevent contact between your baby and the uterine wall?  Like the nerves in the area don't function in the presence of adipose tissue?  Like there is soooo much fat in the abdomen that nobody from the outside could possibly be able to feel an 8 lb. bowling ball rolling around inside?  Come on!!

Plus, there's the actual experience of fat women.  We feel our babies move, trust me.  But somehow, either that experience doesn't get communicated to non-fat folks or they just don't believe it.

So you get these people who tell women that they probably won't feel their babies move in pregnancy because of their fatness, or that their partner will probably never feel the baby move either.

Personally, I think it's another way to make fat women feel bad about pregnancy, like they can't experience all the normal pregnancy stuff other women get to have.  People may not consciously be trying to shame or make fat women feel bad with these remarks, but deep down I think that the unconscious motivation is tsk-tsking.  Really, anyone with half a brain who took a second to think about it (or ask a fat woman about their experience) would know it's not true.

It's like saying, Yeah you can have a baby, but you are so fat you won't get any of the pleasure that goes with it.  Nyah, nyah.

People may not always intend it in a mean-spirited way--it may simply come from ignorance--but what a joy-killer a remark like this is.  Shame on the people who perpetuate this kind of nonsense. 

One Woman's Story

Here's an email I got a while back from someone with exactly that question, plus my reply to her. 
Someone told my husband that I may not be able to feel the baby kick or move because of my weight. I was searching your site...and was just wondering if this is true. It doesn't sound right to me ... because the baby is inside my body...
My Reply:

You are correct. You will feel this baby move. There is no fat inside the uterus, so you will feel the baby move inside you just fine.

You'll probably feel it on a similar timeline as a woman of average size, which can be anywhere from the 12th week or so till the 26th week or so. In fact, you probably are already feeling the baby move but if you've never been pregnant before, you simply may not recognize it as fetal movement yet. It's really very subtle at first. And it takes a while to be sure you really know what it is.

From the OUTSIDE it's true that it may be harder to feel the baby move early on because of intervening "fluff," but in time it will also be felt there. It may happen later than it would happen in a person of average size, but sooner or later, your partner (and you) will be able to feel this baby move from the outside too.

The one caveat to this is that if you have an anterior placenta (a placenta that has implanted on the front side of your uterus, near your belly), that can make it harder (and take a little longer) to feel the baby move internally and/or externally.  It definitely makes it harder to find the baby's heartbeat at first, as I know from my own experience with one of my kids.  But that has nothing to do with obesity, just with placental placement. Skinny women with anterior placentas have the same problems.

Rest assured, you will eventually feel the baby move from both the inside and the outside. You'll feel it from the inside on a similar schedule as other women; it may take longer to feel from the outside, but it will happen.

I'm "morbidly obese," have had 4 babies now, and have been able to feel all of them move, both inside and out. Sometimes I felt the baby moving in the first trimester, usually it was early to middle second trimester, and with my third it was late in the second trimester (because I had an anterior placenta).  But I felt them every time, and eventually so did my husband.  There was never any problem with it.

Even the most supersized woman I've encountered has felt her baby move, sooner or later.

So don't worry, you won't miss out on this wonderful feeling! Feeling your baby move is one of the most special things about pregnancy, so enjoy the heck out of it once you do feel it. It's one of the things I miss most, now that my childbearing days are done. 

Treasure it forever, and don't let some ignorant stranger worry you about it.  In this way, as in so many other ways, your experience of pregnancy as a woman of size will be very comparable to that of other women.  Your weight won't keep you from feeling your baby move, don't worry.

*Anybody out there ever hear this chestnut?

93 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just guessing, but I imagine this myth is perpetuated by shows like "I didn't know I was pregnant!", where many of the women featured are overweight (and since they were unaware of the pregnancy, supposedly did not feel movement). Haven't heard this from anyone I know personally, though.

Jill

Anonymous said...

I've heard that before. I agree, it's often said in a negative tone. But I am quite large at 270lbs and 5'8'', and could feel the first popcorn popping like flutters as early as 15 weeks, a bit earlier with my second as well. And my husband wasn't a huge belly toucher but was able to feel our babies move when he wanted.

Heidi said...

Wow, I never heard that particular one. I have heard that it can take longer for larger women to feel the baby kick but I felt mine around 21 weeks and I know other, thin women who didn't feel theirs until that point in time either.

I will say, it was more difficult for people to see movement externally...but my husband certainly could feel movements JUST fine from around 25/26 weeks.

Sarah May said...

I was 280 pounds when I got pregnant with my son... when I had my c-section I was 301 pounds. From about 3 months on I felt him move and flutter... At about 6 months I could feel giant kicks. I would put Fruit Loops on my belly and watch him kick them off. So... yes, fat women can feel their baby :)

Thank You for your blog! I have been able to share it with so many women!

Janeen said...

I wonder, and this is me speculating, if situations where fat women who show up at the hospital in labor, never knowing that they were pregnant, somehow contributes to this? The sad thing is, I think I may have seen something about this said in the What to Expect When You Are Expecting book but don't quote me on that. Now, with my first, I didn't really begin to feel good movement until around 20 weeks or so. With this baby, it was much earlier, at least 4 weeks if not more. And, not only can I feel movement both on the in and outside, I can SEE the movement too! Now THAT can get a little creepy especially when it's such a movement that reminds you of those Alien movies. lol I even made a comment once that that was probably what gave the creator of those movies the idea of the alien bursting out of the stomach the way it did.

One thing I do kind of lament though, actually looking more pregnant than fat. While I think I definitely look pregnant, with the extra weight, I don't think it's enough for people to actually make that assumption and therefore, I don't get the push from people to touch my belly and stuff. Maybe that's a good thing as I'm sure pregnant women eventually tire of it but it would be nice if someone outside of a very small circle wanted to touch the belly. I mean, it sure moves around enough! lol

But this time around especially I haven't been big on having a lot of pictures of me because I just don't seem to look pregnant enough compared to other women. Doesn't help that I don't have that beautiful single belly bump. No matter how big I get, there is a distinct line where the upper and lower belly meet. The upper is nice and taunt and the lower belly is all flabby. *sigh* And even carrying low this time around, it still did the same thing, very pronounced upper belly and a lower belly that looked anything but pregnant.

Well-Rounded Mama said...

Yes, I would also speculate that this myth may have originated with the common story of the woman who didn't know she was pregnant and showed up at the ER pushing. Many of these women are plus-sized; their size disguises the pregnancy and many of them have irregular cycles due to PCOS and so shrug off missing their periods.

However, not feeling the baby move is a classic sign of emotional denial, such as from the teen who has been sexually abused and has disassociated from her body signs and signals. Such denial happens in women of all sizes....but because more of the women with undiscovered pregnancies tend to be heavier (not showing as much), it gets blamed on their fat instead of on denial.

Another case of correlation instead of causation. It's not CAUSED by being fat....being fat does not prevent feeling the baby move. But because it's easier to miss a pregnant-woman-in-denial if she's fat, those are the ones that tend to slip through and not get detected before labor starts.

So since that's who you tend to see on these shows, people start thinking that fat is to BLAME for not feeling the baby....when in fact it's merely a coincidence, not causal.

Denial is the real issue....as the saying goes, it ain't just a river in Egypt, y'all.

Laura Shum said...

Oh my word! That is so awful! This is my 3rd baby and yes I have not only felt but also seen my babies move from the outside. I am 33 weeks pregnant now and was at the movie theater last night and my friend and I were watching the baby roll around and kick my belly button. Even my 5 year old has felt the baby move from the out side. I find it tragic that so many women that are not a size 4 are made to feel that they are doomed to have not only medical complications but miss out on the best part of pregnancy by far!

Pampered Mom said...

I never really could see movement like some women...where an appendage of some sort was sticking out. We'd all get a big laugh, though, watching my belly jerk around when the baby got the hiccups.

Anonymous said...

I have met women that truly didn't know they were pregnant, and they were large women, but you are right--being large isn't the cause, denial is. Being large may make the baby bump less obvious, externally. It also increases the chance that a woman has been taught to disengage from her body. But, there is no true physical reason that a large woman can't be as in touch as a small woman. Not at all!

I have also heard about teenagers who didn't know until labor. I wonder if in that case, denial was so high and nutrition (and weight gain) was so low, that neither the teen nor others noticed. So, the same thing could happen to a small or large woman. (I used to work with pregnant women--I do admit these scenarios are rare!).

It's too bad women might feel unsupported enough to be in such strong denial. They need support, not disdain.

Amanda said...

I was 365lbs at my highest weight ever during my pregnancy with my HEALTHY NORMAL little girl 2 years ago. I didn't feel her move until midway through the 17th week. By the end of my pregnancy, you could watch my belly move when the belly moved. One of my co-workers laughed at me after a meeting because she spent the entire meeting laughing at my belly jumping. So don't tell me that fat women can't feel it.

Ashley said...

I've had people make similar comments to me, and I'm only an inbetweenie (US size 14). When I mention that I felt my first flutters at 10 weeks, confirmed by doppler at 11 weeks, they just deny it could be possible.

Tami said...

I've felt the baby move as early as 10 weeks, then I've had pregnancies where I didn't feel anything until way beyond 20 weeks, because of an anterior placenta. I have a friend who is ultra-skinny who at 16 weeks was concerned because she hadn't felt the baby move, but they have determined she has an anterior placenta. Clearly belly fat has nothing to do with it.

Aubree said...

I am a member of "thebump.com" and I hear this all the time! I feel so horrible that all of the overweight women (like me) ask when they will feel their baby move. Most of the time they get the answers of "it won't be for a long time" or "you might not feel it until early in the 3rd trimester." I always chime in and let them know that I started feeling my little one around 17 weeks and started to feel it on the outside around 23 weeks. It is just the same as other "skinnier" women.

It makes me so frustrated that people have all of these preconceived notions of overweight pregnant women. Even my doctor has them. I was 224 at my first doctor appointment and now at 28 weeks I am only up 5 pounds. I felt my baby at the same time if not before some of the "skinnier" women that I know that are pregnant!

I love your blog and like to read it all the time. It's nice to have some information related to my needs. Most of the articles aren't geared towards women who are overweight and it seems that the ones that are, tell me that I am going to have a c-section, will have high blood pressure and gestational diabetes, and will likely have a difficult pregnancy. Thank you for keeping this blog!

Becca said...

As a large first-time pregnant woman, I appreciate this post. I'm glad to know that I will get to experience the joy of feeling my little one moving around inside of me.

I have to razz you in a friendly way for referring to non-overweight folks as average. According to the CDC:
* Percent of adults age 20 years and over who are obese: 34% (2007-2008)
* Percent of adults age 20 years and over who are overweight (and not obese): 34% (2007-2008)

That's 68% of us that are not "average". Guess what? Fat is average. ;)

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add my two cents... I'm 39 weeks pregnant and weigh 297 lbs. (Gained about 15 lbs. with the pregnancy.) I could feel small fluttering movements throughout my second trimester and definite movement throughout the third (although I also have an anterior placenta). The only potentially unusual thing was that my husband could actually feel the baby moving OUTSIDE earlier than I could feel her moving INSIDE. So I'm guessing this depends a lot on the individual, and I would certainly agree that fat women feel their babies--in fact, my little lodger is squirming right now! Thanks for this post, every little bit helps destroy those painful misconceptions floating around out there about plus-size pregnancy.
Jessica

MrsTarquinBiscuitbarrel said...

Yes. At least in my case. The fetus pushes from within, and I was five-nine and weighed about 240.

In addition, when I was expecting my third child, the two elder (ages three and five) devised a favorite fetal nickname and game. This started at seven months' gestation, when their little sib (said my OB/GYN) could hear loud, familiar voices from outside, and continued until birth:

I would lie on the bed, hike up my dress and pull down my panties to the top on my pubic hair so that my magnificent Mount Fetus was fully exposed. The sibs would stand at the very edge on one side of the bed and shriek the sib's fetal nickname at the top of their lungs.

WHUMMMPH!!! The yet-to-be-born baby would scootch over noticeably as far as possible to that side of my abdomen. Then the sibs would scramble over to the other side of the bed and shriek the nickname again, as well as whatever they could think up. "Come out now!!" was a favorite, to which I'd reply, "It's not time yet." They would scowl.

WHUMMPHH!! The fetus would race in utero to the other side, making a wildly uneven belly. The sibs would shout greetings, and the fetus would kick with great excitement.

As it says on the shampoo bottle, "Lather, rinse, repeat." The sibs would change side, shouting, and the fetus would wriggle and kick wildly, up to ten times, until I pleaded dizziness. Then the older two would reluctantly stop. The unborn one would kick and gyrate in excitement (or so it seemed to me) until exhaustion set in, and then doze off, while I read or told a story until to the elder two. The elder would deign to bring me a water bottle.

Anonymous said...

sweetheart I am sad that you would even have to worry about this...........I have two now grown children .....I am fat.......and yes I felt my babies throughout so don't listen to crap like this..........

Anonymous said...

Janeen, I have the same belly - like I've got a string tied around the middle! And with both previous pregnancies, it wasn't until about 30-32 weeks that I had the unified belly!

With my first, between the fluff and an anterior placenta, I didn't feel movement externally until about 28 - 30 weeks. With the second, it was definitely earlier than that, even though I had more fluff, because of no anterior placenta. With my current pregnancy, I started feeling flutters internally about a week ago (I'm almost 15 weeks). We'll see when the movement is noticeable externally.

I never had a doc tell me I wouldn't feel the baby externally because of my size, thank goodness. But that piece of wisdom was part of the reason I threw What To Expect When You're Expecting across the room and left it there.

BeingVenus said...

Yeah, I'm 37 BMI, not morbid, but Obese and at 19 weeks (I'm 22 weeks now) my husband could feel the kicks if I placed his hand in the right place. Actually last week I saw a kick from outside my clothes. It's my first pregnancy and I've been feeling them since 15 weeks. I've also been in to yoga, mediation and am very body aware, but I can see how someone could mistake those flutters for gas or a hungry stomach if it's a first pregnancy.
Whoever told your husband that was ignorant and rude. I'm trying to figure out what the point would be in telling someone something like that but I guess people are FULL of annoying information when babies are involved, they just can't help themselves.

BeingVenus said...

Also, as a side note. I was told (incorrectly) by "well meaning" people that I might not be able to see my baby in a normal ultrasound until they were in the mid pregnancy. TOTAL HOGWASH. I guess maybe that was true in the 80's when the machines were weak or something, though I doubt it, but we saw the baby at 6 weeks, all we could make out was the heartbeat on the belly ultrasound and the inner one showed the fetus itself. Come 12 weeks we could see the baby just fine on the screen.

Don't let ignorant people tell you how they think your pregnancy will be. Big girls have been makin' babies since the beginning of time. At one time it was seen as a genetic advantage.

Anonymous said...

I have to admit I was reading this post out of naivete. I am pregnant with my second child, and I've heard that I may (possibly) feel fetal movement sooner b/c this will be my 2nd. The reason this struck my attention is because I am considerably larger than I was with my first, but only until recently. I am ashamed to admit I was a smoker, all the way thru my 1st pregnancy (7yrs ago), until this may. I am so glad I quit, but I have gained at minimum, 20-25 lbs. My concern lies in the fact that I AM diabetic- tho it has nothing to do with my weight- have been for 20 years, and am type 1... but anyway, my concern is that I am starting this pregnancy at the weight at which I almost completed my first pregnancy.

i'll stop rambling now. thank you for a nice blog. I will be stopping by more often now that i'm preggo!

Anonymous said...

I was really sad to read on Babycenter.com that they perpetuate the "fat women don't feel their babies" myth, so I left a comment with a link back to this article! Thank you for posting it!

Anonymous said...

im glad i came across the blog site. im 19wks pregnant and over weight im feeling something but not sure if it is the baby move as this is my first. ive been worried that i my not feel anything because of my weight as alot ov people i know felt there babys move early on. this has given me some peace of mind thankyou all :)

Theresa said...

Ahhhhhh.... this blog is magic! It is truly amazing how feeling normal can instantly relieve stress--certainly a gift for an expecting mom and her bebe. Thanks everyone for posting!

Anonymous said...

being overweight and preg i would have to disagree with the "experts", i have felt baby movement for about 1 week now, i am 12 weeks along. i was thinner for my first preg and felt my daughter at 15 weeks. We should love ourselves for who we are, not what we look like, it is hard when all that trash is shoved in our faces. i choose to see it as i am nurturing life right now, i can worry about my "butt size" when the miracle has been born! i wish for all my fellow ladies to find happiness with how beautiful you are just as you are!

Anonymous said...

Until this blog i was certain that i wasn't going to feel my baby move. I was 285 when i got pregnant with my first child, i am 17 weeks and i haven't felt my baby move. This blog has gave me hope to know that i will feel my baby move. Reading the other comments other women have written has also gave me a peace of mind. I want to thank you for writing this and giving us women a sense of closure knowing that we will feel the wonderful feeling of our baby move.

Anonymous said...

I found this blog and thanks to everyone who's contributed....it makes the confusion a little clearer.
I am 200 lbs with my first pregnancy. I have to admit, I don't know my body very well, because I have MS and Fibromyalgia....with all the skeletal and muscular issues as well as the pain, I never really know what is what!
Now that I'm 24 weeks pregnant, I can definitely feel pronounced kicks and today, I saw my belly poke out several times when baby kicked. My husband said hes been seeing it for a week, I began to get worried and angry, thinking it was because I'm big.
It took longer than I thought, but Im there now!
By the way, these are pronounced kicks and seeing the movement on the outside. I've been able to feel movement for several weeks....no truth to this myth for me, but as I suffer from frequent and painful heartburn, perhaps I'm feeling some of that stuff as well. It can be a tough call and easily mistaken for something else:)

Anonymous said...

I love this blog! Like someone else said it makes me feel normal because there are others feeling what I'm feeling! I too was worried I would not be able to feel or see my baby move from the outside because of my size. I am 5'4", about 240lb and 22 weeks. I have been feeling my baby move (for sure) since week 18! I'm so happy to know and I look forward to seeing and feeling her from the outside also!! According to other sites I should have been able to already.... I'm no longer worried I won't be able to experience that. Thanks for all your post you've really made my day! :-)

Anonymous said...

Thank you soooo much for this website. I'm 28 years old, 5'4'' and 230lbs. I'm pregnant with my second child. I was very average when I got pregnant with my first. However, I gained a whopping 75lbs. during that pregnancy, none of which I have lost. So I had been feeling like this pregnancy was going to be so different. None of the joys like feeling the baby move, etc. Reading your blog has changed my whole outlook. Thank you so much!

Anonymous said...

I'm a big beautiful woman and i've been feeling baby flutter and tumble around since 9 1/2 weeks....which everyone is telling me is impossible and that i must be imagining it, including the midwife. Althougth i don't think they are saying this because of my size (that would be just plain silliness) I'm still really offended. I'm 12 weeks now and the movements are the same and getting stronger. I know what gas feels like, and this is not it!!! The idea that a woman won't feel her baby move because of her size is as crazy as saying you won't have crapms from your period because of your size. Hmmph. Wouldn't that be nice.

Anonymous said...

Complete nonsense! I'm 25 weeks pregnant with my first baby,and let me tell you, FAT GIRLS CAN DEFINATELY FEEL THEIR BABIES MOVE/KICK/KICK-BOX/YOU NAME IT! I started my pregnancy at 239 and I now weigh 252. I started feeling the butterfly movements at 17 weeks, and this morning I woke up at 3:21 am to hard kicking. So yes,you will definately be able to see your baby move. Don't listen to ignorant people.

Anonymous said...

i dont really think it matters if your fat thin tall or small, you have a baby in there and even if your hubby doesnt feel him/her move as soon as you do atleast you have a baby. i can see the confusion as to why some women dont know they are pregnant untill the baby is literally poppin out, as someone who hasent been pregnant before and being overweight and having all the symptoms that are ongoing especially the heavy/full feeling boobs and heartburn and then get a negative test from the doctors,to say the leat its annoying me deepley, especially when ive been getting little popping sensations and then tonight after finished my dinner about 20 minutes later i start feeling somthing in my stomach to the left of my belly button and can even see it ever so slightly, it really p****s me off, i have only done the 1 test and that was last early last month but i havent got anyting to compare my stomach with because iam overweight and dont know anyone thats pregnant right now, i cant find any pictures of women that r about 13 weeks pregnant and overweight and it really frustrates me, especially with having pcos. i have tried to find out where the baby should be situated at the diffrent weeks and cant find nothing, or asking my mum what her pregnancy with me was like but seing as it was 25 years ago she cant remember. just wish the were more overwight women to share there stories/pics, its so frustrating

Anonymous said...

I've heard this being said to many women and have had it said to me. You are completely right...it is NOT true!! My first daughter didn't move much at ALL during my pregnancy and it was confirmed on MANY ultrasounds..my second moved CONSTANTLY and I felt it at 11 weeks. I felt flutters with my son at 10 weeks and with this pregnancy at 8 weeks confirmed by ultrasound. It all depends on how sensitive you are to whats happening and trusting your own body.
I will most definately be passing this page to all women I know.

Monica Kennedy said...

I am 6 ft tall, 340 lbs, 36 yrs old, with PCOS. I have not had a regular menstrual cycle other than minor spotting in over a year. As one who longs to have a baby, there have been times when I thought I felt a baby move only to discover it was just gastrointestinal movements related most likely to gas. Well, lately I have been feeling this a lot, along with lower back pain and a heavy feeling in my uterus - sort of like it is tense. It makes me question if I could be pregnant or could just be loco in la cabasa - either is a good possibility lol. I took a pregnancy test on Easter which was invalid - no result. I bought more today and plan to test in the am - what do you think the chances are I am actually pregnant? Been married almost 9 yrs and never used protection. Well, at least pray for me! Oh, and the movements are all in the lower abdomen - and I was told I have a prolapsed uterus.

Monica Kennedy said...

Oh, and I have not gained any weight - actually lost 25 lbs over past yr.

The Paradigm said...

I was very happy after I read your blog. Just a minute before that, I was telling my husband that I am 18 weeks pregnant now and I might start to feel the baby's movement. He replied me saying you might NOT be able to feel it because I have belly fat!!!I laughed so hard because I knew he always tries to make a comment about that and checked on the internet, found your blog and read it loud to him...he finally apologized and gave me a bigg kiss!!

mandy said...

This is very comforting! I too have been told the same thing by other people and it makes me so happy knowing they are wrong. I am 13 weeks and 1 day along. I cant wait to start feeling my little one move! Thanks for this website too. It makes me happy knowing that there are other plus size women with the same feeling and concerns!

JI said...

This is terrible! Im fat and i feel the baby move everyday! Im 22 weeks and ive felt the fluttering from 15-19 weeks then from 20 to ongoing i feel the little kicks. No its not all the time, and I cant see it move, but i DO feel it move.

Hi Cindy & Stacy said...

I'm a pluss size pregnant woman and I'm almost 11 weeks along. I can't feel my uterus above my pubic line yet. I was wondering when I shold be able to feel it? This is my second pregnancy but it's been 6 years. Thanks!

Jennifer said...

I am 23 weeks and 2 day along and I have been feeling my little munchkin since about 12.5 weeks with alittle flutter almost like when you have an eye twitch well that but in my stomach, I was scheduled for my IPS u/s the next day and I told the tech about feeling the movement (which my mom said was definatly the baby) and the tech said it is too early plus you are a very large girl (6'1 and 334 lbs and have not gained a pound yet). I dismissed it and kinda a a bit of a pang in heart cause I knew it was my baby. Well she started the scan and she said well I guess I should apoligize, I was like oh my god what is wrong... she was like I am pretty sure you were feeling your baby it is moving around like crazy it would not let her take any measurements. I had to hold my stomach so the baby would calm down. Needless to say I am feeling them much stronger now not just a flutter put a poping and gentle kicks, I am just waiting for the day the baby decides to give me a good kick so I can see it on the outside. One thing is no matter what people say including your doctors you are going to know what you are feeling and to trust your instincts this is your body and you know it better than anyone eles.

Victoria said...

You all are inspirational. At 14 weeks and morbidly obese, it brings tears to my eyes that I might feel my TWINS! move, and have a bump. Thank you for the info. I can't wait.

Anonymous said...

I am 28 weeks pregnant and I weigh 240 pounds. I have tried to get pregnant for three years and now my moment has come. I am having a boy and I felt my little one first move when I was 15 weeks pregnant. Now He moves and kicks none stop. That is a myth. Just because your overweight, it doesn't mean you can't feel the baby move or kick. Good Luck!

Anonymous said...

I read in many books and heard many times that heavier women will feel baby less or not at all or later on in pregnancy. As a first time pregnant woman I was sad when I heard this because that was something I always dreampt of feeling. Well what they say about movement is FALSE. I am not only overwieght (5 foot 4 and about 240 pounds) but also a first time mother and also have the placenta in the front... and I started feeling my baby boy moving at about week 13. I believe that it really can not be determined by any of these factors, you will feel the baby when you will feel it and it doesnt depend on how fat you are, whether you had a previous baby or if your placenta is in front or back. Now, I do see that some of the movements are still light (I am now 23 weeks) while others in places are harder, but I think THAT is more about placenta placement than my weight.

Anonymous said...

Thank you thank you thank you to everyone posting on this! I'm 18, pregnant with my first baby, 205 pounds, 19 weeks along and extremely paranoid about everything! I swore I felt a little flutter at week 14 or so but honestly I've had nothing since then. But I don't know what in the world I'm looking for! I've suspected maybe I'm mistaking it for hunger pains or gas, but like I said I just don't know. That being said I've been very very afraid something was wrong with my little girl or that my belly was preventing me from feeling her little kicks, even though the doctor told me a couple weeks ago while looking at her on the sonogram that her spine and everything looked fine. But, after reading this blog and everyone's comments I feel so, SO much better about it. I'm looking forward to feeling the first kick and again I just wanted to thank everyone for making me feel normal. :)

Kathy Sandru said...

I was 340 & 360 respectively when pregnant with both of my sons and I could DEFINITELY feel them moving in between my 4th & 5th months. My husband and I used to joke that both of them were kicking his butt if I slept with my belly next to him while sleeping. It was quite a feeling because these babies didn't only kick, they tumbled, they hiccuped, you name it. And it got worse while pregnant with my first son because he loved music & would kick harder everytime we played music!

britno9 said...

I'm 21 weeks pregnant. I'm 5ft 8in tall and i weight 256bl.I started feeling my baby move at 14WEEKS 4days BUT i was wasnt sure at first about the feeling cuz it is my first pregnancy but when i went to my obgyn appoitment at 15 weeks I was having the same feelings and as we were listening to the baby's heart beat the baby kicked and we heard it "YES, I SAID HEARD THE BABY KICK."I was so worried that i wasnt gona be able to feel the baby move now im 21 weeks with the same feelings and I have not got the BIG KICK and after reading this im so happy to hear I will get to feel the big kick most likly later on in my pregnancy.being that i am overweight I am realy worried about gaining TO MUCH WEIGHT and I even asked my doctor if it was okay for me to lose weight while im pregnant and he said yes that is fine.THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS SITE!!!!!!!!!!

britno9 said...

I'm 20 year old and I'm pregnant with my first child. When I was 14weeks and 4 days pregnant I got this werid feeling like someone was messing with my belly botton lol,I ignored the feeling but then at my OBGYN appoitment at (15 weeks) I was still feeling that werid feeling like someone was playing with belly botton as we were listening to the baby my baby's heart beat i the doctor (HEARD) my baby kick and he she asked if i had any flutters and I said I've been feeling something lol because I've never had feelings like that before. Now I'm 21 weeks 3 days pregnant and I'm waiting for though's BIG KICKS everyone is talking about.I honestly thought because I'm big that I nor my boyfriend will be able to experiance the baby move and feel her move on the outside I love the old staying "BETTER LATER,THEN NEVER" now I honestly can't wait for that amazing feeling.thank you so much for this site.

Anonymous said...

I must be one of the women that perpetuate this myth. I was 13 weeks before I took my first home pregnancy test. I only took it to reassure a friend who was concerned with possibly being pregnant herself so she would take a test.

I never missed a period (was spotting during those 13 weeks about 4 weeks apart from the softening of my cervix) or even had morning sickness. At 255lbs and with Graves Disease I didn't think it could happen to me. I was in denial even after taking 6 home tests. It wasn't until I saw my baby during an ultrasound to date the pregnancy that I cried and began accepting it.

I am now 33 weeks pregnant with this unexpected baby and my husband and I have both felt the baby early if not on time! We may not have planned this pregnancy but we were talking about getting pregnant next year.

Even more shocking is that I am currently 245lbs and fetal growth is normal if not in the top 60th percentile. I lost a huge bit of weight during my second trimester and don't really have that HUGE baby belly I see on both big girls like myself or skinny girls.

Anonymous said...

I'm 33 yrs old and already have a 15 and a 13 yr old son. I have never had regular periods and was always around 180lbs until after my second child when I decided to go on the depovera shot and gained 75lbs and started growing hair on my face. So I stopped taking the shot and I've never been right since. I found out late in each of my first two pregnancies that I was actually pregnant. I'm around 230lbs now and find myself in the same situation and being treated like I'm crazy or something. It's been 13 yrs since I had a child, I quit keeping up with once every 2 or 3 yr periods a long time ago and pretty much quit thinking about the possibility of being pregnant years ago. Now 3 weeks ago my son my Mom and I had a stomach bug that left behind a LOT of gas, even for my son. Well mine never went away and I took a test and I'm pregnant. The people at the Health Dept won't touch me cause I don't know how far along I am and I'm trying to get into an OB now. As if I don't feel stupid enough already these people treat me like a freak. I've never had regular periods and don't have anything wrong that would cause that other than my weight. I've been checked out. But the bottom line is I'm pregnant and the baby is Kung Fu Fighting already and I have no idea how far along I am and it's gonna take another couple week to get into a doctor even with them having this info. So judging from everyone's comments here I could be anywhere from 10 to 30 weeks (eek). My only condolence is that I haven't had any boob leakage or anything yet, but the lack of prenatal care is scaring me. It makes me not even want to talk to these people because of the way they treat me but what choice do I have? Can't deliver at home with grandma and some hot water. I can't believe how much easier it was to deal with health care providers when I was a teenage Mom than now. I guess when we are younger we could give a crap what other people think and at 33 it bothers me a lot to be judged by people than don't even know me. I guess the whole point of this blog is "can fat women feel their babies move?" The answer is YES YES YES, sometimes you want it to STOP even though this is the greatest thing you will EVER feel in your entire life. It just makes you really tired sometimes, or I find that it does me. You enjoy it A LOT, but sometimes it's like DO YOU EVER SLEEP? I guess this time the little one is sleeping when I'm sleeping and giving me hell the entire time I'm awake. At least it makes me feel better every time I feel it since I don't know anything about this pregnancy yet except that it's a WILD child. Things will prob calm down some in the next couple of weeks when I know what is going on and that everything is okay....stress level will def decrease. I also joined a place locally that is called First Call and these are the only people so far that have made me feel any better and will help me deal with doctors and just plain moral support which means so much right now. I just went today for the first time and I feel better today than I have in 3 weeks now. On a personal note I think "fat" girls make a better home for a baby anyway....and I had way less problems and was way more active than all my skinny minny friends during my first two pregnancies. You're already used to carrying that belly around so you have all the necessary muscles before you even conceive where skinny girls are lugging around a suitcase by the first month in. If that makes anyone feel any better.

Well-Rounded Mama said...

Dear Anonymous with the unexpected pregnancy:

Congratulations on your pregnancy!! I hear you on how scary and frustrating this must be when you weren't expecting it and when others are treating you badly about it. You don't deserve that.

I just started a new series on my blog on PCOS, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I think it likely that you have this (or one of the other conditions that can mimic it). Please read the series and see if it sounds like your situation.

With PCOS it's very common to skip periods or have them only occasionally. It's because the body has hormonal issues that make it difficult to finish ovulating. However, sometimes the body does manage to ovulate, and so the woman can get pregnant at that time without realizing it. That's why sometimes women of size can have pregnancies without realizing it for a while.

PCOS has health implications for pregnancy so it's important to be aware of it...although it's a great sign that you've already had 2 pregnancies without problems. Be sure you are eating well and getting regular exercise, which goes a long way towards preventing or minimizing problems.

Remember that you don't have to have a *doctor* for your care; many midwives are far more understanding and size-friendly. There are midwives who attend women at home, but there are midwives (nurse-midwives) who attend women in the hospital. I can't promise any individual midwife would be good for you, but as a group they DO tend to be more size-friendly and more understanding and less judgmental.

PCOS also has lifelong health implications. In particular, if you are not having periods regularly, you are at increased risk for endometrial cancer later in life. But usually this can be prevented with the right treatment. So PLEASE, make sure you get evaluated at some point for PCOS.

You can read more about PCOS at www.pcosupport.org or at www.soulcysters.org. Or on my blog in its new series.

Blessings on you and this new pregnancy. Hang in there, and be sure you insist on a size-friendly provider, and be sure they check you out for PCOS or other related conditions. It's very important for your long-term health that this be diagnosed and treated.

Anonymous said...

I'm the anon with the unexpected pregnancy from a few days ago. Just wanted to let you know that I found a doctor that I really like so far. I've been 3 times already and so far everything is fine with me and the baby. I had an ultrasound two days ago and it's a girl! She played with her feet through the whole ultrasound. The ultrasound specialist was shocked when I told him it was my first professional ultrasound because get this I'm almost 29 weeks! He and his assistant both checked everything they could check and both said they saw no reason to see me again before I deliver. I am so relieved, I can't even tell you how much. I got a paper in the mail today from the OB and Vaginal delivery is checked on it. Both the OB and the ultrasound doctor seem to think everything is perfect and on course for a regular delivery. Everyone has been great. Well just wanted to let you know. I've been reading all the stuff on the PCOS. The doctor also mentioned this because of my periods. He also suggested I get birth control implants instead of having my tubes tied because I could benefit health wise in the long run from birth control. What do you know about the implants that go in your arms? I've had bad experiences with the pill, didn't work, and the shot, gained alot of weight and started growing hair in weird places. I told the doctor this and he seemed to think the implants are the way to go.I'm 33 and this pregnancy was unexpected I don't think I could handle another one in 5 years.....but I am so weary of birth control. Thanks!

Jeni Mama said...

I've experienced that as well... I'm not a huge person by any means- I'm 5'4 and weighed 145 before I got pregnant... I was having trouble feeling the baby move (I'm 25 weeks now and feeling him move much more) and someone said maybe it was because I'm overweight... so stupid! A little extra padding couldn't prevent me from feeling a baby growing and moving inside me! geesh...

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for clearing this up. My first pregnancy i went from being VERY skinny to 180 lbs and i want another baby but was afraid i wouldnt have the same feeling or experience as w my first. WHEEEW! So relieved!! YAY FOR THE FLUFFY BOMBSHELL BEAUTIES!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I don't know how much i weighed when i had my second son - i've always been overweight:-( This was 2002 and the note "difficult scan due to maternal habitus" was a painful dig from the sonographer! However at this time i worked as a special needs education assistant and the most fun many of my pupils had each day was watching my baby bouncing around in my tummy:-) So just enjoy your pregnancy and don't let others get you down!

Cherry said...

I'm 340 lbs. pre-pregnancy, and I felt my baby start moving at 12 weeks. Of course, no one believed me, but this is my 3rd pregnancy, so I DO know what I was feeling. People can be so ignorant, even doctors!

xXxsirinartxXx said...

I am fat, and i'm only 4 months i could feel my baby moving!:)

Katie(: said...

I'm 18 weeks pregnant with my first child and i'm overweight. It was worrying me because i still haven't felt any kicks. I've been feeling small flutters for a few weeks. It was worrying me that i still hadn't felt a kick. I thought maybe because i was a bigger girl i wouldn't really feel anything. I'm so glad i'll be able to(:
I can't wait to feel those first precious kicks!

Anonymous said...

I'm 5'2". I was 100 lbs when I got pregnant wih my first an didn't feel him kick until 24 weeks. Now pregnant with my 3rd I weighed 185 pre-preggo and felt him kick at 14 weeks. I've experience both sides and HATE the way people treat me now. My doctor actually asked me if my OB told me I was fat yet! I said no why would he? And doc said oh trust me he will let you know you're too fat. REALLY?!? Everyone makes comments on how huge I am, my MIL calls me fat mama. I hate people sometimes. Such jerks!

Anonymous said...

I'm an obese at 110kgs (240ish pounds, I'm from Australia) and pregnant with my first child. I felt my little man move for the first time at 10weeks. I was so excited. I tried telling my mother and sister in laws and they told me there was no way I could and that they didn't feel any of their kids move till at least 20weeks and they were thin then. My mum though agreed that I could feel him already. Then at 14 weeks I tried showing the same two women my baby bump. I know my own body and would check my profile in the mirror everyday and hadn't put any weight on yet so I knew what I was seeing was a bump and they said no. Apparently because I'm obese, there would be no possibility of seeing a baby bump and people probably won't notice till I was at least 6months. And this was all coming from family!!! Now at 19 weeks people think I must be carrying twins!! I ended up not telling them anything or being excited around them. No point because everything apparently is impossible because i'm big. Don't listen to any know-it-alls. They just don't have anything else to do but try to take away your excitement. You know your own body. You're the one who's feeling those flutters. Not them. Now I can feel my little guy kicking at my bladder!!! You're beautiful ladies with beautiful hearts and beautiful babies!!!

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to say ...thank you for having this.

I feel very uneducated about my body and being pregnant and being overweight.

I have been scared I will never look pregnant and everyone will just think I ate too much or am just putting on weight.

Tonight, as I talked with other moms online who are giving birth in the same month as me, they were posting about their movement and how much they SEE the movement on the outside and really feel it and I am not really there yet. I have an anterior placenta so I know that is part of it but I wondered if my weight was another part.

So I googled...and here you were. Telling me I will feel like a normal pregnant lady.

So...thank you...thank you. <3 <3 <3 <3 I needed this.

preggerism said...

i dont like the sayingg average size cause im not skinny n im not fat neither but i do have a little baby fat left from my first child and at 11 week every once in awhile i would feel the light thumps of my little one

Anonymous said...

hi. im new here and have been worried for a wile now. im 152kg so a ++ size pregnancy with an anterior placenta. i didnt start to feel the baby move untill 2 weeks and now am just over 25. i wondered when my partner will be able to feel her as i feel like im letting him down as its something i would love to share with him

Anonymous said...

Hy,im on pregnancy n.o 3 with my first i was around 100 kg, i was alot slimmer with my second (around 90 kg) now im 120 kg after quitting smokeing i gained alot of wieght i also went on the depo injection and that made me gain loads!! :( anyway im 11 weeks ive been fealing my baby move for 6 days now at first i thought i was going mad! as im so early on but this is my 3rd and i know the difference with wind and a baby movement.
I hate the way people judge by your wieght i recently had my first mw appoint and im still in shock as to what she said to me!! bearing in mind she had my son and daughters birth wieghts in front of her she said that due to my size i would need extra scans at 28, 32, and 36 i would also have to go on asprin for the rest of my pregnancy! when i said why she said "BECAUSE BIGGER WOMEN HAVE BIGGER BABIES!!" Urm exscuse me?! my daughter 7.11oz and my son was 6.14oz i said to her i think ive more then proved that theory is absoloute bollox!! ive been left furiouse her only input after that was dont shoot the messenger!
i will not be going on asprin and sertanly not haveing extra scans i have had 2 perfectly healthy pregnancys before so theres no reason to think i wont now! Anyway no one believes me that i am fealing my baby move so soon but owel :)

manda9900 said...

Oh man you have no idea what a relief it was to find your blog! I am pregnant for a second time and I am so nervous about this pregnancy than I was with my first. I only made it to 17 weeks last year with my 1st pregnancy because the baby's brain didn't develop properly now a year later and I am just coming in to my 17th week Ive been cringing at the thought of my next ultrasound to find out if this baby is going to make it. But I've been taking my folic acid along with my prenatals so I was told this baby has a better chance. I was curious as to when I would feel the baby move I dont think I've yet mastered knowing if its the baby or gas bubbles moving around in me yet. If anyone has gone through my situation and had a healthy baby I would love to hear that your next baby(s) made it fine!

Anonymous said...

I am currently 16 weeks pregnant with my first (and obese!) and have felt what I believe is my baby move twice. It has felt kind of like flip... like if a goldfish did a somersault.
I was searching for some information because I couldn't figure out how me being obese would cause my uterus, other organs, and skin to be less sensitive. I think that the only possible truth to this is that OTHER people may not be able to feel/see your baby move as soon as thin women.

I will admit, I've not been able to enjoy this pregnancy as much as I think I would if I was thin. I've read sections in books that cause me to worry, I feel like other people look down on me, etc. In reality, I didn't think I was going to get pregnant so easily. I was planning on losing weight and was told it would take me a year or more and significant weight loss before I would have a chance of getting pregnant. I was on birth control for nine years, went off of it, and was pregnant two months later.

I think overweight and obese women show as soon as other women too. It just isn't distinct. Your growing uterus and baby are still just as large week by week as another woman's. This is a thought because I am being told that I don't need maternity clothing as soon as other women. I'm 16 weeks and fit into my pants still, but they hurt because my uterus and baby are just as large as a skinny woman's 16 week uterus/baby. Yes, I have a layer of fat over mine, but I don't know why I have to suffer through the pressure of a buttoned waistband longer because I'm overweight.

Anonymous said...

I'm 19 weeks pregnant with my third bub and haven't felt anything at all. Its strange because with my 1st I was 15 weeks and my second 14 weeks this time I'm heavie but my tummy has protruded more and earlier. I know everything is fine as its been happily moving around on the ultrasound. I know I will feel it soon enough but the thought of only having a few months of feeling it sucks as its one of the best feelings u could experience and my oldest to are just so anxious to feel it so it can be more real for them. It feels like this is my 1st pregnancy as its like I've forgotten how everything goes lol and when n how to expect it lol fingers crossed I feel something soon and relax n enjoy this more

Anonymous said...

I never post comments online but had to on this one. I am a tall size 26 and have worried about feeling bubs since we found out we were pregnant.

I felt him move sporadically starting at 15 weeks. Since 20 weeks, I've felt him move pretty much everyday. Last night I felt him move from the outside for the first time. I'll be 22 weeks tomorrow.

MS. Dez said...

I have been a big mama for all 3 of my pregnancies ( this is my 3rd & with my 2nd I was 5'3 and 285 pds. I can distinctly remember sitting with a bowl of pineapple slices on my stomach at about 26 weeks & my daughter kicking it off into the floor ;) the only thing I hated about that pregnancy was because I was so big people didn't know if I was pregnant or just fat. I spent a lot of time rubbing my belly in public. I have had a MASSIVE weight loss since #2 & I'm only 9 weeks & I swear I felt baby move today. I felt movement early with both previous pregnancies. Don't let people get you down for being a chunky pregnant chick. We can enjoy our pregnancies just as much as a skinny mini ;)

Anna said...

I am 300 Ibs and this is my third pregnancy. I was really worried that i had't felt anything and was about to believe the hype !
i am 22 + 5 days and I have been feeling kicks for the past two weeks, infact now that i know what I am looking for again, i was probably feeling them sooner than I thought. Nothing being felt from the outside yet, but there is padding between the baby and the outide so it makes sense for oterhs not to be able to feel the baby yet.

IveBeenThwarted said...

I'm another who doesn't generally post online, but the subject affected me enough to post. When I first found out I was pregnant (shocker, by the by - I was on the pill,) I was just under 300 lbs. I was immediately told that I wouldn't feel my baby move until 19-20 weeks, MINIMUM.

While I love my doctor, I'd like to utter a huge HA!!! I felt the first for sure tap at a mere 12 weeks and had been feeling some minor wiggles and turns about a week and a half before that. I told my doc, and she flat out said that was impossible and I was either imagining things, or it was gas. At the risk of being crude, I know what gas feels like, and the same with hunger pangs, muscle spasms, etc. etc.

A few weeks ago (appx 16 weeks,) she did a doppler and lo and behold, baby was moving like CRAZY, nonstop. I come to find out last week that hey, there are TWO little ladies renting out space in my tummy, though I don't think that would impact when I feel them as they are close to 30% smaller than a singleton baby would be.

I suppose the moral of the story is if you think you're feeling your baby move, you are. Don't let someone tell you that just because of a few extra pounds of love (or more than a few, in my case) that's going to prevent you from sharing in the mother/infant experience.

Anonymous said...

This is very reassuring to read, however totally contradictory to everything I've been told or read. I am 29 weeks today and a nurse practitioner I saw last week told me I have to have nonstress tests 2X week because of my weight. She claims I won't feel the baby's movements so they need to monitor them. Has anyone else been told this? I'm a very busy woman and incredibly stressed about having to go to the hospital 2X week, plus she says I have to do an ultrasound monthly, plus do my weekly doctors appts. Advice would be great because I don't want to do this but I feel I have to so the baby will be monitored appropriately.

honkydory said...

I feel sooo relieved ;0) Thankyou for your wonderful site <3 I too am obese and 16 weeks pregnant, this is my first pregnancy but I swear ive been feeling 'flutter' movements!! It could very well be then....I cant wait to feel the kicks.

Anonymous said...

Love this site ... I am nealy 19 weeks.and I feel my baby ..I am allso a big woman x

Anonymous said...

I felt DS2 move at exactly 16w. Little fluttery sensation. I went to ER at 24w because I hadn't felt him move all day and was worried. Well the CNM told me as I was lieing there distraught that I shouldn't be able to feel him. Huh? Yeah, I get it, I'm fat, BUT I think I know the difference between baby kicks and gas. Especially since I can feel them from the outside!

Anonymous said...

I'm prego with my first baby, im 17 years old and 20 weeks pregnant. I've seen the baby move on the ultrasound but didn't feel it, idk if the feelings I ge are the baby. I already have a baby bump. It looks bigger depending on what I'm wearing but I can't see the baby move on the outside and another thing, my nipples aren't going brown like my friends, one is darker then the other. Will that change ?

loudy227 said...

I felt my baby at 22 weeks and I was nearing 300 lbs at that time. I probably felt her before then, just didn't know what I was feeling. I felt her most after dinner. Loved the reassurance that she was doing okay.

Anonymous said...

I am a thicker chick, and felt my first baby move from about 5 months until the end. In the last month or two, you could see my little girl moving in my stomach, and she was a smaller baby (6.6). I am pregnant with my second child (a boy), and have been feeling him since I was 15 weeks. I am 20 weeks now, and finally able to feel movements on the outside of my belly. I love being pregnant (even though this is my last because of my age), I feel stronger, healthier, and just so much beautiful. I have had comments about my age or weight with both pregnancies, but if you have the same, don't let it get you down. There is nothing more wonderful or miraculous than having your child growing in your body. I am so blessed because I thought I would never have kids. And here I am, having my second! Enjoy this time and good luck!!

Anonymous said...

I'm 24 years old and 29 weeks pregnant and I currently weigh 285 pounds. I didn't feel/recognize bubs moving until 22 weeks but now I feel him move everyday at roughly the same times. I still haven't felt bubs on the outside and neither has my partner but I'm not giving up yet :) I remember feeling so relieved at my 20 week scan because I watched him moving around like crazy and knew he was active. Then two weeks later I could feel it too !

Anonymous said...

Hi :) im 24 years old and pregnant with my first. I was on the birth control implant for two and a half years. When they first inserted it I had a period for 14 days straight then it stopped and I didn't get another period for two years. I didnt gain much extra weight but I did get a little emotional every month as I usually would during my cycle. Otherwise I had no problems with the implant. And as soon as it wss removed I got pregnant a few months after :) however people react to birth control differently!

Jennifer said...

Thank you...you're information makes me feel better...I am a proud soon to be first time plus size mommy. I felt my little one move around 15 weeks even with an anterior placenta..yet my dr told me (before we knew about placenta placement) that I couldn't have felt baby move. Even with this being my first pregancy I knew he was wrong and I was right...I am now just waiting for the day my hubby can feel our baby move.

Jack Sally said...

I'm 5'1'' and weighed 226 pre pregnancy I'm not 31 weeks with identical boys and oh ya i can feel them moving sometimes see their little butts i have only gained about 20 lbs the whole pregnancy. I get all the same pains and orchids itchiness as regular its hurtful people would say those things if you haven't been in our shoes what right do you think took have to say what we can and can't feel. This is my pregnancy and everything is going perfectly. Good luck ladies keep your head up your little ones well make themselves known.

Liz said...

My mom was fat when she was pregnant with me and she claims she never felt me move. Yet, I'm alive. So either I was really lazy, or there is some amount of truth in this.

Well-Rounded Mama said...

Occasionally there are women who report this. Often it's women who are in denial about the pregnancy or who are not ready to be mothers yet, like those teen mothers who say they never knew they were pregnant. (Not that I'm implying that this was your mom, just pointing out it happens sometimes.)

Or women with an anterior placenta (in front) tend to feel movement less. My third had an anterior placenta. I did feel him move, but much later than all the other kids.

Well-Rounded Mama said...

The point is that sometimes there are women who report they don't feel movement; more likely they don't recognize the movement for what it is. But it happens in women of all sizes.

MOST fat women feel the baby move just fine. It's a myth that they don't because of their weight.

jacqueline jones said...

I have a??? I am a plus size I truly didn't know I was pregnant one off the reason was because I have pco and when I did finally found out I was pregnant i only felt baby movement in my back not in my stomach is that normal I am now 9 months I am about to give birth any minute now. When I found out that I was pregnant I was already 8 months along any info will help

Well-Rounded Mama said...

Jacqueline,

Congrats on your pregnancy! Women who don't realize they are pregnant often have PCOS. It's unusual that you only feel movement in the back, not the front, but perhaps you have an anterior (front) placenta, which definitely inhibits feeling fetal movements, at least somewhat.

Take a deep breath. You can totally do this. You might want to consider hiring a doula (professional labor support) to help you adjust and deal with all of this. That makes it easier, but even if you don't have a doula, you can do this.

May you have a wonderful and blessed birthing and parenting experience.

jacqueline jones said...

Thanks for your response you have help me.. Congratulations to all the beautiful plus size mommies out there. You bare beautiful and wonderfully made!!

Melly said...

I was scared I wouldn't feel my baby move. I was 5'3" and 240lbs when I got pregnant. Sure enough I started feeling little bubbles here and there starting at week 16. By week 20 I was pretty sure I had felt it every few days, but still told myself that it could just be weird gas or something. When I made it to week 22 I was sure it was the baby. By week 24 my husband was able to feel a kick even through all the fat. It just gets stronger every week and if you eat certain foods or play certain music the baby will move more. There's no way those punches won't be felt, they're strong! The only thing that would keep you from feeling your baby is the placement of the placenta, and that can happen to thin women just as easily as to any of us bigger women! Also, they would tell you at your mid pregnancy scan if you have that problem.

Anonymous said...

I am 10 weeks today with my second child, third pregnancy and I have felt the baby move for the last two days. I weigh 280 pounds. With my daughter, I weighed 190 and did not feel her move until later on. I came to this site because on the baby bump website someone said that FAT people do not feel thier baby move like skinny people do, and you may not show like a skinny person would. It all just feeds into the fact that being fat is looked down on. And that pisses me off! I have been married eight years, my skinny friend got divorced after two. Other skinny friends can't keep a man. So...um...being fat should not be looked down on. My husband is a very muscular, healthy man. He does not look at me any differently than he did before I was this size. And the doctor has not said the first thing about my weight and me being pregnant. So all of you ladies that are not a stick, be proud! And please do not worry what ignorant people say about you!

Anonymous said...

I'm 19wks pregnant with My 4th pregnancy , 5"6 310lbs b4 pregnant and I've been feeling my baby move a few weeks now.

Heather Brunette said...

I really want to thank you all for the posts. Im newly pregnant with my first and weigh 290 lbs. I have a friend who is on her third pregnancy and keeps telling me that I may never feel the baby kick or move and I started to freak out a little bit about it especially with my first trimester being as hard as it has been so its been upsetting to say the least because to me that would make no sense. It makes a little sense that it would take longer to feel it from the outside but eventually you would feel it there as well (especially with the way ive felt some of these kids kick from the smaller women). This just puts a little more ease on my mind that everything will be the same as everybody else, but it also upsets me that she would be that ignorant abt it with a third pregnancy of her own. I used to be really envious of skinnier women, but have finally realized just how beautiful I am in my own skin, ps were curvier than the skinny ones, I feel they almost look like poles at least all the ones I know. As of right now, I dont feel like pregnancy is such a beautiful thing, but im only at week six, it can only go up from here right? Thank you all again.

Kayleigh Gates said...

Thank you so much for this blog. I am 5'2 and 205 lbs and was told by many people that myth and had begun to believe it since I am now 17 weeks and still haven't felt any movement. I am now looking forward to the first movements of my handsome baby boy and can't wait for his daddy to feel it, too!

Blaire Cannon said...

I am 399 lbs and 20 weeks pregnant. I felt the little fluttering at 13 weeks and I am still feeling lil things here and there....hopefully it will intensify as the time goes on...but yeah I think the whole "big women cant feel their baby" is BS! People want to have something to say always no matter what it is. ..I have good blood pressure and I went for the 20 week sonogram for all the checks on heart..kidney and spinal problems.....NONE whatsoever. My doctor does want me exercising walking mainly 30 minutes a day...and eating right and staying hydrated....but she hasnt been overly judgemental about my weight...I think people need to get over themselves.....Hello big women are in the world.... get over it ♡